It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Randomize
