The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
