All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize