Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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