Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
