I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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