even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
