i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?