Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
what day is it and did you see me today?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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