How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
