Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
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