carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
