I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
