ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize