It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
