I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
