sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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