your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
