I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
