And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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