OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
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