Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
