Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize