I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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