I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
