let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
