she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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