I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
There's even glitter on my cock...
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