You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
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Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
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I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
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