If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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