I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
