If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize