Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(218): View more from Minnesota

I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.

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(770): View more from Georgia

The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions

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(417): View more from Missouri

I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.

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(845): View more from New York

Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.

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(425): View more from Washington

...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.

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(+97): View more from

Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I need more 20 something year old penis in my life

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