Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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