idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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