so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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