Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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