FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
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