This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize