Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
