I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
