marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
