I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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