I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
