Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
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