i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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