Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
