I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
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