I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Are my feet made of real feet?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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