i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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