You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
