when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
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