Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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